Pathways to Happiness Newsletter - July 2009 #2
Monthly Research and Exercises For You to Get Happier
FREE - Phone Follow-up Discussions after each newsletter – August 2, 7 PM

Happiness is a Public Service

There is no duty we so underrate as the duty of being happy.
By being happy we sow anonymous benefits upon the world.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

It’s your duty to be happy?! Your happiness makes the world a better place for all! How?

1. Happiness is contagious!
2. When people feel good, they function better, and are more likely to help others.
3. We gain the deep happiness of fulfilling a purpose when we give our own special gifts to the world.

1. Happiness Is Contagious!

In the last newsletter we considered how laughter is contagious (if we let it be.) Well, there is evidence that happiness in general is contagious.

A huge study (4,700 people, with 50,000 interconnections, followed over 20 years) found that people who are happy or become happy boost the chances that someone they know will be happy.  The power of happiness, moreover, can span another degree of separation, elevating the mood of that person's husband, wife, brother, sister, friend or next-door neighbor.  The effect decreases with each degree of separation but can still be detected in the friend of a friend of a friend! Standard measures for well-being were used to measure happiness.  The researchers, Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler, say that the analysis controlled for environmental factors (e.g., climate) that may have exerted the same effect on people in the study.  Similar contagion effects were previously found for smoking-cessation and obesity. In other words, when someone gives up smoking, it increases the likelihood that someone he knows will also give up smoking.  The difference was that being physically nearby the other person increased the happiness contagion but did not affect the contagion of smoking cessation or obesity.  Sadness is also contagious but less so.  Conclusion? If you are learning to be happier, you are not being selfish, you are doing a public service!

2. When people feel good, they function better and are more likely to help others!

The work of researcher Barbara Frederickson has shown that people who are experiencing even a transient positive emotion are more creative and learn more quickly than people in negative or neutral feeling states. A doctor who is feeling good will diagnose an obscure ailment more accurately. Not only that, a good feeling state makes us feel more affiliation with other people and we are more likely to help them. Imagine the benefits of cultivating positive emotion at your workplace and in your home. What makes you feel good? What do you do that makes other people feel good? The Pathways course, Maximizing Joy!, is designed to help you cultivate positive emotion. See a full description of this tele-seminar, to begin on Sept 22, at http://www.pathwaystohappiness.com. BOB, CAN YOU MAKE THIS LINK TO THAT PART OF THE HOME PAGE THAT DESCRIBES THIS COURSE? Is there an anchor point ? Give me the specific link to include. (Graduates can retake this course for half price.)

3. We gain the deep happiness of fulfilling a purpose, when we give our own special gifts to the world.

We are most passionate and of purposeful when we are expressing our highest values. Researchers Martin Seligman and Chritopher Peterson have searched for values which are held in common by all religions and cultures. Their proposed list contains 24 character traits. Each of us have some which come more naturally to us than do others. These are our own signature strengths, which have probably been evident since we were 5 years old. If we use our top strengths in what we do every day, we can feel passionate engagement and the immense satisfaction of contributing our special gifts to making the world a better place. To learn more about the 24 strengths, click here. The Pathways course, Finding Your Purpose, is designed to help you connect and contribute in this way.

For our sources, click here .

Laughter reprised

In the last newsletter, we considered the benefits of laughter. The responses I received illustrate the richness that can be had from discussion. I will share a few of the gems below.

Laughter is the release for embarrassment, a kind of laughing at oneself that relieves tension.

Laughter can arise from surprise and delight! That has nothing to do with humor but is sheer play and pleasure! .

Claudia Jean Hill, a creativity coach, shared that laughter for her was part of an ongoing childhood trauma! While growing up, some kids relentlessly ridiculed her disabled little brother. She felt for him but was unable to protect him. Indeed, laughter can be based on cruelty, as in laughing AT someone, and this kind of laughter can leave scars. When Claudia hears a group of people laughing, her first thought/feeling is a reminder of that old pain. If you see this kind of “humor” happening, interrupt it! Point out the cruelty! Kids experience more than their share of this kind of humor. Studies have shown that the other kids, the bystanders, don’t like it but don’t do anything because they don’t want to become a target. If bystanders can be taught to stand up, the torment can be ended. Bullies want easy victims.

My husband, Don, told me of a friend of his who is wonderfully witty, but many of his jokes were hurtful to others. The butts of his jokes felt pressure to fake a laugh rather than own up to the pain. When the witty one was finally told about these hurt feelings, he completely dropped that kind of humor from his repertoire! He is still a very funny guy but now a lot kinder.

Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
- Victor Borge

Sources:

The happiness contagion research was reviewed by Rob Stein in the Washington Post

Pam Belluck reviewed the same research in the New York Times

Barbara Fredrickson’s entire career has been dedicated to the study of positive emotion.   One of her books is Positivity: Groundbreaking Research Reveals How to Embrace the Hidden Strength of Positive Emotions.

Character Strengths and Virtues: A Handbook and Classification, Christopher Petersen and Martin Seligman, 2004, Oxford Press.

Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize your

Potential for Lasting Fulfillment, 2003, Dr. Martin Seligman.

To sign up for the free discussion and get instructions
Contact Nancy, Nancy@pathwaystohappiness.com or 301 587-5735 x2

Coming EVENTS in September: Maximizing Joy! 7 Sunday evening phone classes.
Learn to direct your attention in ways that will make you happier.
See pathwaystohappiness.com to register and for more info.

Like what you read here? Sign up for our Telephone Seminars - Research-validated skills and practices for staying happy - even in the face of stress. Participants find them supportive, fun, inexpensive, and easy to schedule - no commute!